My Favorite Place Is Next to You
by brumal
Summary: Nagisa followed Rei everywhere, and Rei let him. Rei let him until he didn't, and Nagisa didn't know what to do.


**A/N**: If you would like to share this story on Tumblr, please reblog it directly from my blog! There's a link to my Tumblr on my account page. Please look through my "Story" tag to find it! Thank you.

* * *

Nagisa followed Rei everywhere.

At first, Rei didn't know what to do with him, because people usually left him alone or only talked to him briefly. But Nagisa never seemed to tire of his company and actively sought it at all times.

Their day started in the same train and same car because, after Nagisa realized they both came from the same direction, he asked Rei to ride the eighth train car every day. And then they walked to homeroom together. Rei and Nagisa had the same classes all day long and even spent lunchtime together with Haruka and Makoto. And, of course, after school, they would have swim practice with everyone. But even after that, on the train _back_, they would be together. More often than not, Nagisa would also invite himself over to Rei's house.

In effect, they usually spent ten-hour days together, sometimes even more. And that was only on the weekdays. On weekends, Nagisa still found some way to be with Rei.

But after spending so much time together with the blonde, Rei got used to it and even accepted it.

Soon, the two were practically inseparable.

Anyone who wanted to look for Nagisa only needed to look as far as Rei and vice-versa. The only other pair whose relationship challenged their own was probably Haruka and Makoto's, which also had many people confused and talking.

Rei was always terribly accommodating to the blonde. Even though he wasn't sure what to do with Nagisa at first, he quickly got used to having a second shadow who was constantly talking to and at him. Nagisa was like a puppy that had chosen _him_ and never wanted to let him go.

The taller boy was sure that he would quickly tire of Nagisa's antics, but the only thing that happened was that he grew even fonder of Nagisa. It wasn't long before he kept watching out for the blonde too.

Every time Nagisa fell asleep on the train, he let him doze on his shoulder. Before tests and quizzes, he helped the blonde prepare for them. During lunchtime, the taller boy gave him half his lunch and insisted that sweet bread was not nutritious enough. Whenever he wanted to dash into danger, Rei pulled him back.

And so, Nagisa followed Rei everywhere, and Rei let him.

Rei let him until he didn't, and Nagisa didn't know what to do.

* * *

"C'mon, pleeease?"

"No, Nagisa-kun."

"But why not?"

"It's better if you stay here."

Nagisa sighed heavily but didn't let go of Rei's hand, which he had clutched between his own. He swung it around childishly and pouted.

"That's no fair!"

"Life isn't fair," Rei replied with a small smile. He looked down at Nagisa with gentle eyes.

The blonde squeezed Rei's hand a little harder than necessary. "Boo," he said. Then he let go and sat down on a bench. "Rei-chan's no fun!"

After a second of hesitation, Rei sat down next to Nagisa. "Is that so?" he asked.

"Mmn." He began to swing his legs back and forth, still pouting. "Why do you have to go so far anyway?"

"That's a very complicated question that I can't answer very easily, Nagisa-kun," he replied patiently.

"I know, but still…." He trailed off and glanced at Rei, who was gazing ahead with slightly unfocused eyes. He looked back down at his lap. "It'd be better if I went with you, y'know."

Rei didn't say anything.

"I'll miss you," Nagisa said.

A moment of silence passed. And then, Rei said, "I know. I'll miss you too."

"Heck, I miss you already! A lot."

The taller boy laughed charmingly.

"If I went with you, y'know—"

"If you _stayed _here, Nagisa-kun," Rei cut him off very firmly with his own sentence, "you'd be able to find a job as a historian and continue studying what you like most—"

"Does that mean I'll be a teacher?"

"And you will find a nice girlfriend and date her for several years—"

"That sounds nice, but I don't _want _a girlfriend."

"And then, you'd marry her and have two children—"

"Rei-chan, I don't want children either."

"Or maybe not and raise a dog instead—"

"Will I have a cat too?"

"You'll live in a modest apartment with two small bedrooms—"

"I'd be okay with just one."

"And a balcony for you to grow your favorite plants—"

"And yours too, right?"

"You'll be able to see Haruka-senpai and Makoto-senpai once in a while—"

"They'll probably still be friends, huh?"

"And you can tell them how you've been doing—"

"Only if they tell me how they've been doing first!"

"And you can tell them how happy you are—"

"Will I be?"

And here, Rei stopped abruptly. Without looking at Nagisa, he simply said, "Yes."

The blonde stared at him with intense eyes.

"Rei-chan," he called out softly, "will I be happy?"

This time, the taller boy turned to face him. "Yes," he replied gently, "you will be."

Nagisa frowned and furrowed his brows. "I don't want any of that though. Well, I still want the part with Haru-chan and Mako-chan, but I don't _want_ any of that stuff.

"I'm okay if I don't get a job as a historian, and I don't care about getting a girlfriend and marrying her. And I could live without a dog or a nice apartment," he said. "Rei-chan," Nagisa called again, "I just want you."

"You'll be happy," Rei insisted calmly.

"Even without you?"

"Even without me," he confirmed.

Slowly, the blonde shook his head. "No, I wouldn't. You know that."

"You're just being silly," the taller boy replied, "and impulsive."

"That's not true." But Nagisa's words had no spitfire in them. He leaned forward and laced his fingers together.

"Of course it is," Rei said.

"It'd be better," Nagisa said after taking in a deep breath, "if I went with you."

"You don't really want that, Nagisa-kun. You like it here."

Abruptly, he bolted up from the bench and stood over Rei angrily. "I want to be with you more than here!"

"Everyone would miss you."

"They can deal with it!"

"Then you can deal with it too, can't you?"

Nagisa fell silent and his sudden flare of rage died down immediately. He sucked in a breath. "That's not fair."

"Life's not fair," Rei said again. "But it'll be okay. If it's you, Nagisa-kun, then it'll definitely be okay."

"Rei-chan, I…" he said, lifting his face only slightly to see Rei looking back at him with those same, gentle eyes which held no trace of resentment or anger. "I like you."

"I know."

"I _like_ you," he insisted more strongly.

Rei breathed in and closed his eyes. "I know."

"Rei-chan—"

"I like you too, Nagisa-kun."

Quietly, Nagisa reached up with both his hands and pressed his palms against Rei's cheeks and jaws. He leaned down and brushed his lips ever-so-lightly against Rei's and held his breath. Neither of them moved and only let the soft contact continue.

Nagisa pulled back but didn't let go.

"I want to go with you," he said, and his voice finally quavered a little.

One of Rei's hands reached up and covered Nagisa's warmly. He pressed his cheek closer to his palm and looked straight into Nagisa's eyes. "Stay," he said. "You'll be happy here."

"I'll miss you," the blonde said. Then, he swallowed and corrected himself. "I miss you."

Rei smiled and squeezed his hand tightly.

"I know."

* * *

Nagisa woke up.

He rolled over to his side and groggily checked one of the clocks on his nightstand. It was barely breaching three o'clock. He curled up, pulled his thick blankets closer to his chin, and buried his face into his pillow, carefully breathing but finding it impossible.

Tears kept dripping out from his eyes, and his nose was stuffing up. He opened his lips and started sucking in shaky breaths that he could barely control.

It was always like this.

No matter how many times he said he wanted to go, Rei always told him to _stay_, and no argument he ever thought up could convince him otherwise.

He wished Rei would just _listen_ to him for once and stop being so selfish.

Nagisa always thought it was unfair, how easily and firmly Rei persuaded him to remain, but it pained him so much to do so. Every day was so hard to go through, but he still smiled and bore through them.

Still, it would be easier if he were with Rei, he knew.

But no matter how much teasing and coercing he ever did to Rei, if the taller boy really didn't want it, then Nagisa wouldn't push it. It was fun to tease Rei, but only if Nagisa knew it wouldn't hurt him.

And he knew that, if he breached this promise, Rei would hurt so terribly much. And that was the only reason he stayed, no matter how much he wanted to go.

At least, for now, he would stay.

He didn't know how many years he would have to wait until Rei would finally open his arms and say, "Nagisa-kun, come," but until then, he would remain.

In this world that was so miserable and worthless, in this time that was forever too sluggish and painful, in this place that was so much less beautiful without Rei, he would stay.

Because Rei wouldn't want him to go so soon, and Nagisa had already hurt Rei too much to be able to hurt him ever again.


End file.
